"Show Transcript"

So, what are the behaviors of a troubled wife?

Moreover, what are the clues your wife displays when she is unhappy and considering or planning to leave your marriage?

A more important question is why?

Do you know…do you even care?

Those of you listening who think your wife will never leave you are in a dream world.

And if right now the answer to the question of, “Are you and your wife as emotionally close as you could be?” is no or I’m not sure…

You have entered the Wife’s Exit Strategy Zone where your wife is considering or has considered what to do about the lack of emotional connection in your marriage.

Why? Because for her this is the most important thing (above God, the children, her duty as a wife or mother etc.)

Once the closeness is gone, she will start telling herself, “This is not what I signed up for!”

Then comes the question, Can I be happier with him or without him?

If the answer, is I can be happier. Sadly, she will start planning her exit strategy. And you her husband will not even suspect it.

For this reason, the clues in this series are so valuable as they give you an idea of what is about to happen, if you are willing to see and act upon them!

If you make the rookie mistake and think, she is being emotional or I’ll take care of this later…

You’ll find that later never comes and your wife and family have exited stage left!

Because I know from experience that no one teaches us how to build a great, loving, passionate, and exciting marriage over decades!

So, in my effort to help you, I present to you the clues that if noticed or better yet removed from your marriage, will help you rekindle it and save you and your family much pain and agony!

In today’s episode, we cover clue #30…that your wife may want a divorce

We’ll go into this more after the break.

 

[If You’re Getting Value From This Podcast And Would Like more personal Marriage Help…]

Visit SaveMyCatholicMarriage.com for an opportunity to work with me personally for free!

Yes, within 30 days learn how to become a better husband that attracts your wife back to you!

Visit SaveMyCatholicMarriage.com and get a plan tailored specific to your marriage and situation.

I’ve helped hundreds of men in their marriages.

Allow me the chance to help you, using my personal and gained experience.

Visit SaveMyCatholicMarriage.com…For superior coaching for your marriage.

Again…SaveMyCatholicMarraige.com

That’s…SaveMyCatholicMarriage.com to become the man God created you to be and the husband your wife needs!

Lastly, I always get the question…why don’t you help women. And I always answer them…I do!

So, for all of you Beloved wives out there that want to reignite that feeling of emotional closeness and complete love from your hubby

Consider Marriage Coaching and visit SaveMyCatholicMarriage.com

for an improved marriage within 30 days!

Before I tell you the #31 clue let’s review the previous 30…

1) Does she seem distant?

2) Is she spending more time with single friends?

3) Does she seem uninterested in the marital embrace?

4) Is she still as supportive as she used to be?

5) Is she still as loving as she used to be?

6) Does she go out to clubs and events without you?

7) Does she take longer to answer your texts or phone messages?

8) Has her conversation with you become very short and to the point?

9) Has the bickering increased?

10) Has the arguing increased?

11) Has she started putting the kids, above you?

12) Has she started putting her friends, siblings above you?

13) Have you going to mass and entering the spiritual battle daily

14) Does she seem unusually depressed or unhappy?

15) You make love less than once per week

16) You make love less than once a month

17) Has she lost weight for no apparent reason

18) Has she started getting her hair done more often for no apparent reason?

19) Lately, does she dress nicer, or more provocative?

20) Are you beating her home, when before she was already home?

21) She blames you for everything wrong in your marriage!

22) You can’t seem to make her laugh anymore

23) Her phone is now hidden and locked

24) She no longer cares where you’ve been or keeps tabs on you

25) Her hugs and kisses seem shorter with no feeling

26) She is keeping secrets and being vague even when you ask her

27) She doesn’t care you spend too much time with friends

28) She places her parents above you!

29) She no looks at you or makes loving eye contact

30) She increasingly needs more time alone

So, what is clue #31 that your wife may want a divorce?

Drum roll please – You just can’t listen to her without interrupting.

The good ole Wife’s Exit Strategy

We just can’t seem to get away from it can we.

If this is not the most devastating clue to your marriage…

It is very close.

The nagging, the belittling, the defending yourself, and yes, the not listening…

because what you have to say is 10 times more important than anything the most important person in your life has to say.

As I’ve said many times in this clueless marriage series.

The first sign that you have serious marriage problems is nagging.

And this just happens to be the first phase of the Wife’s Exit Strategy.

Why?

Because at this stage, your wife still loves you deeply but feels you don’t love or cherish her.

Which to her means she is not #1 in your life.

So, she nags, to get affirmation of your love for her.

But of course, us being men, we just don’t listen.

And eventually your wife will digress into avoidance.

Which means in her mind…

you don’t care what she thinks.

You don’t care that she has your best interest at heart and only wants to nurture, respect, and love you.

And she gets very tired of trying to reach you.

So, she shuts down.

She stops talking to you.

She stops wanting to make love.

She stops wanting to do things with you.

She is on her way out…

and has decided that instead of an argument…

I will just remain quiet and dormant.

I won’t ever mention any more problems.

Because if I do, he will fight with me and I’m too emotionally exhausted to fight anymore!

Avoidance is just as bad or worse than arguing, fighting, debating, or bickering.

But for her it helps her fight the pain.

And she starts to bury her feelings for you as well.

This protects her emotionally and psychologically.

Which is why if this goes on for years…

It makes it extremely hard to cause those feelings to again rise in her.

You see, before avoidance happens, most husbands don’t hear her pleas for assurance, closeness, oneness with her beloved.

All we men hear is noise!

Which of course is a rookie mistake.

Gentlemen, husbands, Christian Soldiers hear me…

When your wife’s mouth is moving…

YOURS IS CLOSED!

This will serve you well!

You close it and not only listen…

But listen attentively, unless you have a clarifying question.

You never defend yourself, you never look away, you never defend,, interrupt, attack back, point out her flaws, you never call her names, you never raise your voice.

You do sit there empathetically and listen with your body language, your eyes looking directly and affectionately into hers.

And when she is done, you take responsibility for anything that you did do wrong.

And look her square in the eye and ask her sincerely…

Sweetheart, what can I do to make this better!

And then you get off your butt and take action on whatever she says that can make it better.

And most of all, you don’t bitch or whine about it.

You do it with great enthusiasm!

That is it.

Get it? Got it? Good!!!

This alone, will change your marriage in two weeks!

You see in scripture, your wife is not called to love you…

She is called to respect you.

In scripture, you are called to love your wife as Christ loved the Church.

Which means what my friend?

He died for her!

Can you do no less?…BAM!