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You must ask God to give you power to fight against the sin of pride which is your greatest enemy - the root of all that is evil, and the failure of all that is good. For God resists the proud"
~Saint Vincent De Paul
Will Pride Cost You Your Beloved?
This problem is enormous with men. We let our pride impede sincere help. Meanwhile, our predicament sinks further and further into oblivion.
Many cases, we wait so long, our situation becomes unrepairable. And, we hit bottom! Thereby, allowing our Beloved's reasons for divorce to become validated.
My question is, how long will you put your marriage on hold?
How far must you fall?
How much longer does your beloved have to suffer?
How much longer must she wait for you to take hold, stand up, put her first?
More important, are you beyond a doubt, ready to sacrifice your marriage?
For these reasons; procrastination and taking your marriage for granted. Are you ready for those consequences?
Do you in fact, want these unanswered questions to be included as reasons for divorce in your marriage?
Enter Prideful Paul
Ah, the big trap (pride). Pride the root cause of almost every sin.
“What can he tell me about my wife?”
“What can he tell me about my marriage?”
“What does he know about my family life?”
“I don’t need anything from anybody!”
“I can figure this out all on my own.”
Oh really? Then why are you here?
You’re here because you need more, want more, crave more than what you now have. In fact, I don’t blame you. You sense something isn’t quite right.
But, having a closed mind in this matter won’t help. This reasoning will keep you entrapped inside yourself. For one thing, every question posed above, mirrored my life at one time or another.
Despite this fact, seeking the truth saved me.
The Story Of Adam Revisited
Has someone ever come to you for help? Thereafter, refuse to let you help them? They are so caught up in themselves and their ego, the truth can’t peek through?
Well, I encountered such an experience. Adam is a young confident man, a newlywed. Although, he’s never been married. Adam has numerous children by at least two different women other than his new wife.
Don’t ask me how he found her. In truth, Adam’s wife being a virgin is a blessing to their marriage. The reason being, she won’t have any accompanying baggage to work through (failed sexual relationships, other men’s children for example). Thereby squashing many future reasons for divorce.
Now, I understand from personal experience, how hard meshing one child into a family can be. Problem; Adam has several. Not to mention, with two different mothers.
Furthermore, this marriage starting, has the potential to become volatile (too many people in one marriage). Similar to merging onto an on ramp during rush hour (just won’t fit).
Can you blast, “Complications are coming.”
“Complications are coming.”
Wives need extraordinary love, care and attention. A conclusion not hard to grasp. To exemplify, new wives, oh my gosh; multiply this by five.
New brides are fragile. As a matter of fact, they require continuous validity of the decision they just made. The decision to spend the rest of their lives with the groom.
In this new union, we have multiple moms, multiple children. Not to mention, the real possibility of the bride experiencing slight envy over not having any children with her husband.
Can you appreciate the predicament? The other women are one up on her. They have something she doesn’t. This intuition is natural (She’s human.)
At present, Adam approaches me with a problem. Sex is non-existent. Marital intimacy is a leaf carried away by a breeze.
Meanwhile, his new bride is all over the place. It hurts. Or, she doesn’t want to do it. Adding, I’m tired, because of work. In fact, any excuse to put him off.
Again, to Adam, the blame lies with his wife. Every bit. In particular, the sacred intimacy part. He believes he’s an expert, and he understands the precise actions to take.
The problem is, he doesn’t know. In fact, if he did, his wife may not refuse to give every excuse in the book to avoid loving him. No new bride does that. What’s her payoff?
How many newlyweds do you know of who are unable to keep their hands off each other? Right, none!
To repeat Adam doesn’t realize this point. If he expressed even a small tidbit of humility. He might solve his problem.
Not a surprise, a couple of years later; Adam still suffers from a lack of intimacy in his marriage. And, the reasons for divorce loom over him. However, these can be fixed. But not before, he hits bottom.
Of course pride is your number one objection and the number one reason men fail.
[pullquote]Pride becomes an objection, because it causes men to rationalize, they don’t need help. Furthermore, encouraging them to reason that there marriage is in better shape than it actually is.[/pullquote]
But, the objections and major reasons for failure don’t stop with pride. In fact, there are several different types of men, who help foster the reasons for divorce in our society.
Below, I list a few of them. In fact, scores of men possess one of these; even all of them.
Well, have fun. Consider if you see yourself, in any of the categories below.
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8 Men who Got It Wrong!
True manhood, submits to the truth, no matter how hard it is"
A man who won't listen; knows everything. As well as, denies the truth, even when it's presented
to him factually and faithfully. He's full of selfishness, and refuses to sacrifice. His ideas, and what he believes, loom above everything, and everyone else. Including the Father! He believes he's actually greater than he truly is.
The man with no plan: Everyone has their own reasons for divorce. But a battle plan is vital to the
success of never needing a divorce. Creating a marriage maintenance plan, before you have problems is the answer. The key is not to wait until the marriage is falling apart, and falling off a cliff. Again, in order to take productive action, you must devise a blueprint.
The man who refuses to assess his situation: These men may
accept there’s a problem, but they ignore the crisis and procrastinate. Most of the time, these men don’t realize their predicament is worse than it appears.
The man who denies a problem even exists: These men are the worst. They hide behind their wife or
children. Their wife is basically sleeping with another man, and he still denies a problem exists. She has given him so many clues and hints of her depression or unhappiness. Resulting, in her taking drastic measure to get him to pull his head out of his butt! Still, he wallows in his weakness.
The man who continues to focus on his wife’s faults and imperfections: These men are condemned to failure. They refuse to become laser
focused on fixing themselves. Again, continuing to blame his beloved, his children, work, his mom, dad, his friend, the government or God for all his problems. In essence, anyone but himself.
The man who solicits advice from ignorant or unsuccessful people: Short and simple; you don’t take marriage advice in any form from
anybody who isn’t married or is at present divorced! In most cases, they are failures, and they will place their biases about marriage upon you. Remember; MISERY LOVES COMPANY!
The man who fails to remove most of or all distractions in order to become laser focused on his beloved: Sacrifice, sacrifice, sacrifice. These men
refuse to give up or deny themselves current pleasures or desires (for example, friends, television, other women). Their beloved is screaming for their soul mate. Who in fact, refuses to hear them. Can there exist any more of a coward on this earth?
The man who refuses to enact obedience to the Father, and insert Him smack dab in the middle of his Holy Union. Again, these men are
doomed to failure. The Holy sacrament of marriage takes three. These men don’t even realize they’re miserable. Evil has engulfed their marriage by proof of constant problems, trials and tribulations that inflict punishment on their Holy Union and family daily.
No Examples Of Great Marriages
To begin, first you must recognize what a magnificent marriage is.
In fact, that’s where Marriage Unchained enters the picture. In essence, you need a mentor. Someone who’s been where you are. As well as, where you’re trying to go.
Simple right? Ha-ha, no it isn’t.
But we can get there (perseverance).
How Do You Place A Value On Forever?
A marriage where your beloved feels totally and completely loved
A marriage where your wife feels secure.
A marriage where your wife feels happy.
A marriage where your beloved feels sexual fulfillment uninhibited.
A marriage where you and your wife are best friends.
A marriage full of trust, vulnerability and unselfishness.
A home filled with peace.
A marriage enhanced by sacred intimacy.
A marriage of complete self-giving, sacrifice and fidelity.
A marriage full of Grace, prayer and The Father.
A marriage where your beloved spreads her love, fulfillment and happiness
throughout your family.
This isn’t hype, but truth if you put in the work!
- For peace?
- For your beloved to once again approach you to make sacred love to her?
- For one hour, two hours, three hours, four hours, five hours, six hours plus?
- For the lifelong satisfaction of a marriage not just surviving but thriving?
- Even if you’re 35, 45, 55 or 65 years young!
Release your doubt, get a plan; jettison it into practice.
Moreover, begin to unchain your trust, unchain your passion, unchain your sacrifice, unchain your vulnerability, unchain your intimacy, unchain your unselfishness, unchain your will!
While at last, unchaining your marriage, and, terminating all reasons for divorce.
I must testify. It's a magnificent place to be!
To summarize and state once again, Catholic Alpha is about leading you down the path to Sainthood and Holiness. And, that starts with your marriage. As I've stated many times before, you are commanded to get your beloved to Heaven. Even at the sacrifice of your one and only life.
You can’t be the man God is calling you to be without your wife; without your marriage. Furthermore, you need her. She is part of you; she is made for you; she is made from you.
In This Article: How We've Rocked It!
- How pride is the #1 reason men fail in their mission to save their marriage.
- The top seven secondary reasons men fail and the description of each and how they affect your success.
- How to spot a great marriage.
- Where to find help to obtain a marvelous marriage.
- How a bad marriage looks and how to avoid them.
In My Upcoming Article We'll Focus On:
- One of the most neglected questions that is never discussed in a marriage.
- Why it's never asked.
- And how asking this vital question, can change your whole approach to the Holy Caress.
- While helping subdue your reasons for divorce.
